Badges of honor, or ugly disfigurement??
Today, at work, we recognized a significant accomplishment. To mark the occasion, the company passed out commemorative T-shirts and we took a company photo on the lawn out in front of the building. All were required to don the new T shirt and pose.
The T-shirts were short sleeve.
I have some very bad scars on my left arm from a car accident. As a result, I usually (well, always) wear long sleeved shirts - so no one needs to see the ugliness.
So for picture taking day, I brought along a long sleeve white tee shirt, which I wore under the company one. Kristen, VP of marketing and company fashionista, did not approve. "Rich, that just does not work. Take off the long sleeve shirt." She ordered, before the photo shoot.
"I can't"
"Why not?"
I rolled up my left sleeve to expose some of the scaring.
"What?" she asked.
"The scars. They're all over my arm. I don't want to ruin the picture."
"What happened?" She asked.
I explained about the car crash - the drunk driver (it's all in some old post).
"Oh, for goodness sake." she scoffed. "No one will see it. There are 40 people in the picture - you won't be able to see the texture of the skin on your arm."
"I'm really not that comfortable exposing it."
"Rich, people with scars are much more interesting. You should wear it proudly as part of what made you who you are today. Don't hide it. Scars are a badge of honor."
No, scars are just an ugly disfigurement. They are not a source of pride. At least that's my point of view. There's nothing cool about looking ugly, and nothing cool about almost losing an arm.
I left my shirt on.
The CEO was wearing his jacket (over the T shirt - that didn't work either)
But what about the scars you can't see? The ones on the inside. I doubt I'll ever get over what Lynn did to me. It's a scar I'll carry on my soul forever.
Badge of honor?
Ugly disfigurement?
How does one tell the difference?
About Me
reading...
Trail of Crumbs - a reccommendation from Maurizio, about food and relationships - plus the author is the hottest iron chef judge. Looking forward to finishing it.
drinking...
Wild Turkey Bourbon - 101 proof. A wonderful anesthetic for the soul. And it comes in really large bottles, too.
listening to...
19 - Adele - Can't call this pop, its more of a Blues Jazz fusion - a bunch of tasty tunes with good vocals and great sax riffs. Worth a listen.
4 comments:
Sometimes scars are all of the above and sometimes they are a surrender. I have an ugly scar on my neck. I cannot cover it up all year round if ever at all. Turtle necks in SoCal work about one day year and because of the damage to my neck, scarves are annoying. That scar is from neck surgery and the surgery due to my neck collapsing and my neck collapsing because an ex liked to choke me when he wasn't trying to kill me a few other ways. Everyday I see that scar, although to be honest a few days can now go by with me not seeing it, and it reminds me of what I survived. It reminds of me who I will never be again. It reminds me of who I am today. It reminds me that vanity is a waste of time. It reminds me that I am only as sick as my secrets and this is one secret that cannot be hidden. When I am asked about it, I tell the truth. It has been freeing. It has been a to surrender what was once a huge sick secret. The scars on the iside are another story altogether. They are easier to hide and so much uglier. Time has faded many of them but as with scars on the outside, they always leave a telltale mark. What I do know is that I would rather have the scars than be dead. See? It's all good.
I have been thinking about you last question. How to tell the difference? The scars on the outside won't ruin your life but the ones on the inside might if you let them.
I don't know if internal scars ever go away, I don't thinks so, I carry many.
But I agree with Petunia,the scars you carry inside can greatly impact your life. You must choose what to do with them, use them as a stepping stone to move forward, or use it as dead weight to keep you where you are.
Petunia wins! :)
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