The Rebound Guy

I was the rebound guy, once before. It wasn't that bad.

October 30, 1993 (cue harp music and blurry video).

He was the big man on campus. His dad was a local celebrity, and he was rich. Tall, good looking, charismatic, had something to do with sports. Not the quarterback on the football team, but something - I don't recall. He was wildly popular. Everybody loved him. He lived in the same dorm as I did. He always had really cute girlfriends. Case in point was sitting right in front of me.

It was a toga party. Everyone dressed in sheets, loud music, lots of beer. It was held in the cafeteria of the residence hall. $5 got you in, and $1 bought a bad beer. She was sitting down, leaning on him - one elbow on his shoulder. He was turned away from her, talking to one of his friends. She said something to me. With all the noise I couldn't make it out. I bent down so I could hear her better.

"He doesn't appreciate me." She said - almost yelling - and nodding her head toward her boyfriend. It was loud enough for him to hear. She was still leaning on him.

"That" I replied, "is criminal."

She gave me a look that said "Are you going to do anything about it?" I looked at him. I'm sure he heard the exchange. He was still looking away, talking with some guy. He showed no reaction at all.

I knew her. She ate at the same cafeteria. I had seen her around on campus. We had chatted a few time. She was know as "his girl" from the start of the semester.

I held out my hand, "Dance?"

She took my hand, and smiled broadly. We walked out to the dance floor. The next song up was Oingo Boingo's "Dead Man's Party" (It was Halloween, after all). I really like that song now.

After a couple of dances I bought her a beer and we went outside. We chatted. She complained about her boyfriend, went on about what a jerk he was. I would counter from time to time with, "Oh, he can't be that bad" to which she would respond with even more examples of horrible things he had done.

He came outside with a group of his friends. She saw him. She grabbed me, kissed me and put her tongue down my throat. I was being used. And I liked it.

She eventually suggested going back to her room and getting out of these sheets. I agreed. It was a Saturday night and her roommate was out for the weekend. She made love to me, angry. I showed an amazing amount of appreciation. I told her how wonderful she was. I told her how stupid her old boyfriend was.

I must have done something right, because she kept me around for another 6 months. I regularly sent flowers to her dorm room. I left her silly notes (this was before the age of IM and texting - man, I'm getting old!) I bought her chocolates, learned her favorite things, showered her with affection and attention. She loved it. Mostly, she loved showing off her attentive boyfriend to her friends. Flowers were best if delivered to the front desk of the dorm, at a time when they would not be picked up for a while - so everyone could see them. The best gifts were things she could show off. She was still using me, and I still liked it.

Eventually, we drifted apart. She was high maintenance. Finals near the end of the spring term distracted me - and her - enough for us to lose interest. It was one of my easiest break ups. Sitting in her dorm and splitting a bottle of champagne after finals were over, she sighed "I'm weary, way beyond tired." She was looking outside, avoiding my eyes.

"It's not working, is it?" I asked.

"No" she replied.

"You were awesome."

"Yeah, I know" she joked - at least I think it was a joke.

"I'm gonna remember you forever."

"Yeah, I know" she said again, finally looking into my eyes - she gave me a crooked grin.

We finished the champagne. I kissed her and said good bye.

"You're sweet, Rich" she said as I walked out the door. I've hated that expression ever since.

I replied "Yeah, I know." We were steady friends through the end of college.

I still can remember her phone number, her dorm room number, her favorite flower, her favorite food, 15 years later.