Moving Day

I made my decision about the jobs. I am going for the start-up. A little less money now, and perhaps a bit more work. But this is what I came to silicon valley for – to participate in technology innovation. And, perhaps, to get some financial reward beyond the salary. And the salary is more than adequate.

I called the hiring managers and let them know. Company A (the start-up) was pleased and asked for a start date. He wanted me to start today. I held him off to Monday. That’s when Lynn starts her new job, too. This gives us a long weekend – without me having the stress of unemployment looming over my head.

I called company B (big computer company) and let them know. They were disappointed asked if there was something in the offer that could be fixed to change my mind (cool, I hadn’t thought of that.) No. They thanked me for the interest blah, blah, blah.

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One thing about having a truck is that you make a lot of friends really quickly. You do a lot of moves for these friends. I was happy to move Lynn out of her townhouse in Milpitas. Eric (former co-worker and all around good guy) came along to help. We lifted with heavy things and Lynn got all the knickknacks and light stuff. While we were dragging the heavy dresser out though the living room, Lynn came up behind me, grabbed my ass, and said “You’re so wonderful.” That’s all the payment that I need. (Usually I demand beer and pizza).

There was a for sale sign in the yard. I had forgotten that she owned the place with Jim. I don’t know how they did it, or what the split was.

We took all of her clothes, a dresser, a desk, a book shelf, one of the TVs. She had a bunch of boxes packed which we loaded onto my truck. She had her car stuffed with things. We packed up most of the firewood off the rear deck, I took that back to my place – her apartment does not have a fireplace. All told, it was a single trip.

When we got to the apartment, the bed had been delivered. It’s a waterbed called a somma. It’s a unique design, where the water is in these 6 foot long tubes that are about 8 inches in diameter. Very phallic. Needless to say, we had a great time filling the tubes and putting the bed together. There was a lot of giggling. I haven’t had this much fun in a long time. Once the bed was together we broke it in. I think I rather like the waterbed effect.

We then spent most of the evening shopping – for glasses, kitchenware, towels, basic food. Everything you need to set up a home. We found a really neat wine rack at Crate and Barrel - it only holds 8 bottles - which is not enough – so I bought 2. Tonight we’ll go to K and L wines and I’ll fill it up. A house warming gift.

We got some Chinese take-out from a place in downtown Los Gatos, and sitting the floor of her dining room – kitchen nook, really. I put up some pictures while she set up the kitchen.

We ended the day with a soak in the Jacuzzi. It was a cold night and I wrapped myself in a towel and ran for the pool (but I did at least bring my swim trunks). The warm water was wonderful on the tired muscles. After a while we went back to the apartment and stepped into the shower together. She was wearing a gray one piece bathing suit that zippered down the front. We undressed each other slowly and, ahem, well… got really, really clean.

I woke up at 3 in the morning tangled up in her limbs and sunk into the water bed. I was quite hungry, and was going to root around in the fridge. I woke her, unintentionally, while trying to untangle myself. She pulled me to her. Half asleep, we made love again.

Afterward, I snuck out to the kitchen and found a container of oreo cookie ice cream. Lynn wandered out. “There’s a naked man in my kitchen eating ice cream” she said with mock alarm.

“Then you should pull up a spoon and join him.” I replied as evenly as I could.

We finished the ice cream. I have a new favorite flavor.

When I left to go home this morning, she gave me a key to the apartment.

Lynn's new apartment

Lynn got her new apartment yesterday. I drove her over to the complex she selected in Los Gatos. After seeing a bunch of apartments with her, I knew that she would pick the one with the large bedroom and a big walk-in closet. The complex is pretty nice, with a pool and Jacuzzi, washers and dryers in the units and 24 hour security. It’s pretty expensive, but she got a nice raise with the new job.

She didn’t ask me to share the apartment with her. She told me that she needs some space and time to heal. I don’t really understand it, but the break up with Jim has been really hard on her. She was with him for about 4 years and they were engaged.

The apartment is just a few miles from her new job. And even closer to one of the companies that I have an offer from.

She signed all the paperwork in the rental office. She got 3 sets of keys, we walked over to the apartment she picked out and we went inside. It had the smell of new to it. We kissed. “Why didn’t we get together back in college?” she asked me while hugging me in the empty apartment.

“I don’t know", I replied. She was the cute – and smart – undergrad who was in a couple of my graduate level computer classes. She always got special attention from the TAs – who were always guys. She had very long black hair (which she still has) which is very eye catching. But this was not that distinctive, in Hawaii anyway. As I recall I tried to flirt with her, but got no response. Back then I was rather smitten with Karen – bit that’s a whole ‘nother story.

Later today we will be moving her stuff from her townhouse in Milpitas to her new apartment. A mutual friend who understands the situation has agreed to get Jim out of the house and keep him out for 4 hours. So we can get her stuff out without worrying about running into him.

“So which job are you going to take?” she asked.

“I’m still deciding. The commute to company B would be really convenient from here. But company A just seems like the right thing to do.”

“You’re going to pick company B. I know it.”

I got the job!

The offers come rolling in (finally). Yes, yesterday I got 2 offers for employment at companies that I would like to work for, and jobs that would be fun to do.

So, how to decide. Job A – it is at a small start-up at an office park in San Jose – located in a nondescript office park on Zanker Rd to be specific. They are offering a pretty good salary and a lot of stock options. The company is in the area of internet security and was founded by one of the luminaries of the internet boom. He is seriously rich from his last two start-ups. He brought the executive VP, and the director of marketing with him. There are 12 guys in the company – all are founders. I would be the first non-founder hired into the company. If they are anywhere near as successful as they have in the past – that should actually make me rich. My headhuntress tells me that the salary is a bit low, but the stock options are much better than she has seen for others in similar positions. There would be virtually no social life here. But the work would be a lot of fun.

Job B – is at a large company in South San Jose. You have heard of this company – even if you are not in the technology field. There are about four thousand folks at the location where I would be working. The commute from Lynn’s new apartment (at least the one I think she will settle on) is really easy. Perhaps I’m being presumptuous that I will be spending a lot of time there, but I have a feeling. The salary there is about 10% more, which is nice, but the stock options there are a bit limited. The company is really stable and the job should be quite safe. But there is little upside – no possibility of getting rich. The work would be fun.

How do you decide between two really good choices? I’ve never been good at this. When I go through one door, the other will close, permanently. It’s the permanence that bothers me. OK - commitment phobic? I guess, with a little indecisiveness thrown in. I need to sleep on this. I’ve told both hiring manager’s that I will decide and get back to them on Wednesday.

Incognito

Lynn and I spent Thursday and Friday nights at a secret undisclosed location. Discretion being the better part of valor (and because angry ex-boyfriends with firearms scare the shit out of me) we took a couple of days to hide out in a local hotel. Lynn told me that Jim either knew or strongly suspected that we were sleeping together, and he had firearms, and he was damn pissed. That was enough for me, I was going into hiding - at least for a while. Anyway, hiding at a local hotel was nice, since we didn't need to worry about housemates walking in on us playing. And it was nice not worrying about Jim coming after us.

My housemates reported that all was quiet at my house while we were gone, there was no half drunk shotgun toting pissed off ex-boyfriend screaming in the front yard (OK, maybe that's a bit overly dramatic, but my imagination runs away with me). Jim has had a few days to cool off - so I suspect that we'll be OK. We will - I promise - steer very clear of him.

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Yesterday there was a party at Leslie’s house. She and two other housemates live in Santa Cruz in a rented house, not far from the beach. She joined my former company a few months ago. A bunch of folks from the company were invited, Dave (former boss man who fired my ass) who would usually have been included in a gathering like this was conspicuously absent. It would have been normal for Jim (Lynn's ex) to be there as well - but he was thankfully not there.

It was a pot-luck affair and Lynn and I went together. We checked out of our secret undisclosed location and went over to my house saturday afternoon with the fixings for a huge salad. She set to work in the kitchen. I asked if there was anything that I could do.

“Yes,” she replied. “You can get undressed and get in bed.” She smiled slyly.

I walked around behind her. Kissed her neck and gave her a gentle squeeze on the bottom. “You don’t have to ask twice” I said.

I trotted off to my bedroom leaving a trail of clothes for her to follow. I didn’t have to wait long. When she entered the room, she was wearing just a baby blue camisole with white lace fringes and matching tap pants.

We arrived at the party fashionably late.

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There was lots of good food and drink at the party. Much of the gossip was centered around the evil H and K (hatchet men destroying my former employer) and what they would do with the company, and Lynn’s new job.

The party died down around 1:00 a.m. The less than sober (including me and Lynn) were given places to sleep. Lynn and I camped out on the floor in front of the fireplace in the living room. Once the house was quiet, we began to play yet again – careful to stay under the blanket, as we were in a public area.

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The next morning, we were awoken by the chatting of folks on the couch. It seems that we had gathered an audience. We had our clothes spread out in a circle around us. Lynn pulled the blanket up to her chin.

Linda was sitting in a recliner near the door drinking a cup of coffee. She smiled at us and said “Good morning, you two. It’s so good to see that you got together.”

“Was it obvious?” I asked.

“Really obvious” she replied, smiling.

We chatted a bit more. But it was getting awkward, as more people were gathering in the living room. We picked up out clothes and wrapped the blanket around ourselves and stumbled to the bathroom.

The bathroom had an old fashioned claw footed tub, with a rainspout shower head. We took a long hot shower together, got dressed and joined the rest of the folks.

There were about 10 people and we decided to go for a Sunday brunch. Unfortunately, the cuisine that was chosen was Mexican. Somehow, half hungover I could not get enthused about a breakfast burrito. Lynn agreed with me, but to be social we went along.

After brunch we drove back to the valley, stopping in Los Gatos and Campbell to look at apartments for Lynn. That Los Gatos is really nice, but pretty expensive. I’m guessing that Lynn ends up there.

Note that I say "Lynn ends up there" - as in singular, and not "we end up there". I'd be happy to start living in sin tomorrow - but she tells me that she can't do that now. That's OK - I'm happy to give her all the time and space she needs.

Never Again

"Rich, Are you at home?" came the voice over the phone. It was Lynn. her voice was shaky. She didn't sound right.

"Yeah, are you OK?"

"Can I come over?"

"Of course. You don't even need to ask."

About 20 minutes later there was a knock on my door.

She had a cut on her right cheek. It was fresh and raw. And a bruise around her eye.

"Oh god. Did Jim do this?" She burst into tears. She nodded. She hugged me.

"You are never going near him again." It was not a question, it was a command, and a promise.

I cleaned her up. Then we sat on the couch - and once again she cried herself to sleep in my arms.

The best laid plans of mice and men...

Life has been amazingly good.

I'm afraid I might wake up from this impossibly good dream.

Yesterday's plan: pick up Lynn from work. Whisk her off to my place, feed her a great dinner. Open a really good bottle of merlot, and snuggle on the couch. Make mad passionate love until the wee hours of the morning. We sleep in late.

Yesterday's reality: pick up Lynn from work. Whisk her off to my place, feed her a great dinner. Open a really good bottle of merlot, snuggle on the couch. She starts to sob. She buries her face in my chest and starts to really cry. She cries herself to sleep in may arms. I rub her back and run my fingers through her hair. We sleep on the couch.

I don't understand her pain. I wish there was more that I could do for her. I wish I could make her happy.

I've got 2 tickets to Paradise

"Let's go somewhere" Lynn (my old BFF and new lover) said, "somewhere exotic."

I've always wanted to go to the British Virgin Islands.

Lynn is turning 30 later this year, so for her birthday I'm getting her a trip - to somewhere exotic.

I just booked 2 tickets San Francisco to Tortola. Upgraded to first class. I knew those frequent flyer miles would come in handy. We fly from SFO to MIA (Miami), where we overnight in a hotel near the airport. That's the only way to avoid a red-eye - which I hate passionately. And I count the 6:00 a.m. flight out of SFO as a red-eye. A red-eye is not any kind of way to start a vacation.

Then from Miami we fly to the British Virgin Islands via San Juan.

I can't wait. We are staying on Tortola for 3 nights. With much fine dining, decadent drinking, and sex planned. Then we have 3 nights on Guana Island. Without knowing where my next paycheck is coming from, I'm not ready to commit myself to a full week at a $1,000+ per night resort. Guana Island is a private island resort with no more than 34 guests on the island at any one time. You can rent the whole thing out (for insane amounts of money), but we just have a bungalow for 2 on the beach.

It will be bliss.

Happy Valentines Day

Champagne, Sex, Chocolate.

What a wonderful holiday.

She got the job

I found out that I didn't get the job at Tim's company in a most unusual way. Lynn called with awesome news. She got the job (and there was only one position, so - by process of elimination - I didn't get it). She turned in her resignation to Dave and then called me. I must admit that I was a bit disappointed at not getting the job myself, but pleased that she got it and was able to land one so quickly.

To celebrate, we lunched late at the McCormick and Schmick’s seafood restaurant in downtown San Jose, with a bottle of champagne - and when that ran out we had another. I couldn't resist getting a room at the Fairmont across the street. (I also couldn't drive anywhere). It was expensive and extravagant, but life is short. Unless I find a job soon, I’ll be in the poor house. But this was worth it. We went upstairs and made love and napped in each others arms until early in the evening.

Lynn headed back to Milpitas at about 7:00 to get some fresh clothes. She's been staying at my place since the vodka incident, except for one night. Tonight, we'll stay at the Fairmont and have room service breakfast in bed for valentines day. Damn, that sounds awesome. I'm calling for a late check-out.

With her new place of employment determined, she wants to start looking for a new apartment tomorrow. Jim is history. I'm so glad that she's finally leaving him for good.

I sat down on the bed and looked out over San Jose and pondered the future. I could still smell Lynn on the pillows.

It is so wonderful having my best friend as my lover.

Olives, in a chilled vodka sauce

I was at home alone yesterday. I didn't have any interviews lined up and nothing to do. It's kinda strange not going to work while everyone else is out and about. I made a bunch of calls and set up a couple of interviews, but by mid-day I was bored. I watched the cartoon channel for a while, flipped through the soap operas. I regularly checked my e-mail account to see if the job offers were flowing in.

At about 7:00 there was a knock on the front door. I was home alone, Scott was away and Jason (my housemates) would be out late tonight. I was not expecting anyone. I opened the door and it was Lynn. “I brought you dinner” she said, smiling. She held out a bag with New York steaks and huge baking potatoes in it.

“What about a vegetable I asked?”

She produced another bag, containing a chilled bottle of vodka and a jar of olives. “Olives, they are a vegetable, right? Prepared in a chilled vodka sauce.”

Part of me did not want to let her in. Drinking and being alone with her was not a good idea –and I said I would not do it. But I could hardly turn her away. They should make more women like Lynn. “You're awesome. Thanks.” I gave her a friendly peck on the cheek and let her in.

I turned on the oven and threw the potatoes in, after slathering with olive oil and sea salt. Then I made us some strong vodka martinis.Then we went out to the back patio and I fired up the grill. It was cold and dark, but there is no other way to prepare a good New York steak than to grill it over mesquite chunk charcoal. We sat on the patio, drank martinis, and huddled around the grill to keep warm.

Once the steaks were done, we went inside and ate. I built a fire in the fireplace and we sat and talked until about 11:00. She is still not saying much about Jim, but she is still living with him. We talked about the layoff. Lynn is looking for a job and will leave the company. Moral has dropped to a new low back at the office. While our – uh, my former – group lost just one (moi), the overall layoff was a pretty good size. There were also some benefit cuts. H and K are sure doing a great job of cutting costs.

She was getting ready to leave. I walked her to the door, really not wanting her to go. With the door open she stepped out, turned around and leaned forward to kiss me goodbye. She gave me a quick peck. I reached behind her and pulled her close and really kissed her. She kissed back.

“Should I stay?” She asked.

“Are you leaving Jim?”

“Yes”

“Then please stay” I whispered and I pulled her inside. I kicked the door closed.

We stumbled over to the couch in the living room. I turned down the lights and we slowly undressed each other. We made love to the light of the dying embers of the fire. We blissfully drifted off to sleep in each others arms. I can't even begin to describe how wonderful it was - so I won't even try.

I’m glad I did’t need to go to work today.

Comfort food

The rejections are piling up. I can’t count the number of interviews I’ve been on. Eagerly telling the story of my life over and over again to bored hiring managers, who don’t even seem to want to be there. Asking, what I hope to be, probing questions about their business and company’s future. Friday I had four initial interviews. It’s grueling.

So yesterday I am cooked myself some real comfort food. For me, the ultimate comfort food is risotto. It is a real pain to cook well, but it is sooo worth it.

Paired with a really good Pinot Grigio it's really soul satisfying.

Now I’m ready for another week of rejections.

Risotto

2 tablespoons olive oil
1 small onion
a couple cloves of garlic
½ teaspoon salt (a large pinch)
¼ cup good white wine
1 chicken breast, poached and cubed
1 cup broccoli florettes , raw chopped up small
6 cups chicken stock (I did homemade – makes the house smell sooo good)
1 cup medium grain rice
3 tablespoons butter
about 1/3 cup parmesan cheese, grated – from Italy – nothing from a green can!
1 or 2 teaspoons while truffle oil (optional, if you can get it)
¼ cup heavy cream (optional)
fresh ground pepper to taste

Bring the chicken stock to a simmer in a separate pot, do this before you start anything else. It can heat up while you prep the other ingredients. You’re going to add the stock to the rice during the cooking process, and it needs to be just under boiling.

With the stock heating up, prepare all your other ingredients. Once the cooking starts, you won’t have time for anything else. Chop up a small onion and a couple of cloves of garlic. Next cut up and cook anything that goes in the risotto – I like chicken and broccoli (use anything you like – I like no more than 2 or 3 additions – shrimp and asparagus is classic, as is a mix of mushrooms) I usually poach a chicken breast and cut it up in bite sized chunks and cut up broccoli into small florettes. The broccoli I leave raw, it will cook when you throw it in at the end. Grate a handful of parmesan cheese. Finally, measure out a cup of rice.

There’s a huge debate on what kind of rice. The traditional risotto is made from Arborio rice from Italy. I’ve tried it and I really like the results that I get from calrose rice better. This is a medium grain rice that you can get at Costco for less than a 50 cents per pound. Arborio will set you back $4-$6 per cup in most of the high end grocery stores in the bay area. In Italy you can buy Arborio rice for about 2 euros per kilo - $1.50 a pound – so the local stores are just ripping us off. Tyler Florence had a show on risotto on the food channel where he recommends carnaroli from Italy – I need to try that. You can get that from various places on the internet for about $2 a pound.

Oh, one last thing. Open a good chilled pinot grigio from Italy. Pour yourself a glass and start sipping. Make sure you save a ¼ cup or so to go in the risotto.

Now you’re ready to cook. Turn off the phones, accept no interruptions for next 30 minutes. Need to pee? Do it now – once you start, you can’t stop. I said it was good, I didn’t say it was easy.

First, sweat the onions and garlic in the olive oil and salt until they are soft and translucent. Keep the heat low, or the garlic will burn and get bitter. Here you can add some dry herbage that matches your accompaniments. If you have fresh herbs (and why wouldn’t you) then put them in near the end of the cooking process. Next put in the rice, and up the heat a bit. Stir constantly for about 2 or 3 minutes, until the rice gives off a nutty smell and starts to brown. What you’re trying to do is toast the grains of rice. They should soak up all the olive oil and it should start to get sticky. Next pour in a splash of the wine ¼ to ½ a cup. Stir until it’s absorbed.

Now it gets tedious. Put in ½ a cup or so of the hot stock and stir until it is completely absorbed. Repeat this until the rice is just almost cooked (you need to taste it to see, but it will be at least 20 minutes but not more than 30.) And, yes, you need to stand there and stir it constantly. Don’t stop stirring, even for a minute, not for anything. The rice will burn, cook unevenly, and it won’t come out creamy. The stirring rubs the starch off the rice and that makes the most creamy wonderful sauce.

After the rice is almost cooked (only way to tell is to taste), turn off the heat and throw in your accents. For me, this is poached chicken breast and broccoli. Throw in a knob of butter and put the top on the lid and let it sit for 5 minutes. Now you can throw in any herbs that are fresh, I like thyme. The rice will finish cooking and the residual heat will cook the small bits of broccoli perfectly.

After 5 minutes, add the parmesan cheese (and white truffle oil, if you have it) and stir. If you are feeling really decadent, add a bit of heavy cream – but it doesn’t really need it.

A little cracked pepper and a fresh grating of parmesan cheese is all it needs. Eat and enjoy with a good pinot grigio.

I love this stuff.

Damn, I miss rug burns

It's late, I've been drinking, perusing various blogs that I read.

I just read a post that reminded me of getting rug burns.

Damn, I miss rug burns.

I need to get to sleep.

(no visual on this post, you're welcome)

Confidence...

... worn well, makes the man.

I read that somewhere and it stuck with me.

When I go to an interview, I walk confidently into their office. I look squarely in the eyes of the manager I'm talking to. I give a firm, but not crushing handshake. I speak of my professional accomplishments with authority, but without arrogance. I have researched the company and I know where their weaknesses are, and I know how I can contribute. I ooze self assuredness and confidence.

But it's all an act.

Fact is, I'm scared shitless. Scared that I won't measure up. Scared of being judged. Scared of being rejected.

What I'm really afraid of is not getting a job, any job. I can live poor. It's not fun, but I can do it. And I know it's irrational, but I fear not being able to pay my rent, or buy food. Weird, huh?

But because of that, I throw everything I've got into every interview.

I walk out drained and spent. This is hard.

I wonder if I'll ever have confidence.

I see the other candidates, eager young faces, exuding confidence. Wanting to impress.

Walking out of an interview I caught a glimpse of a guy out of the corner of my eye. Shoulders square, head held high, walking with purpose and authority. And I was thinking, how - one day - I'll get it together like that guy. A second later, I realized it was my reflection in a wall of glass that I was seeing.

Damn, I'm good at faking it.

City of the Cats

On Wednesday I went for an interview over at Tim’s company in Campbell. Yesterday, Lynn had an interview there, too. One of us is a shoe in for the job, as they are a supplier to our old company. We talked with their support folks and engineers on the phone all the time. We both know their products pretty well. They know us pretty well. Networking is a great way to get a new job.

Last night I met Tim and Lynn at the Los Gatos Brewing company, along with Lynn’s friend and her friend's significant other.

Tim and Lynn arrived together - fresh from her interview. It was funny, when I saw them together I got a twinge of jealousy - something about the way they look, the way they move together. Isn't that sick? I mean, I don't have her (and probably never will) and I'm jealous of yet another guy who doesn't have her.

I arrived from another interview so I was dressed up. Tim arrived from work and was dressed down in an old leather jacket - he rides a motorcycle. I think we looked like total opposites. He has dark hair and skin and a stocky build. I’m tall and lanky with light hair and skin. We sat on opposite sides of Lynn in a booth and across from her friends.

The food and drink there were good, but a bit on the pricey side for us unemployed folks. Never-mind, I still have a big severance check – and unemployment should kick in soon.

A good dinner was had by all. Afterwards we took a walk through downtown Los Gatos. I overheard Lynn talking with her friend, she was showing off "her men." Her friend was impressed but laughed, she thought we were a real “Leather and Lace” pair – I guess that would make me the lace. Oh, well.

At the end of the evening, I walked Lynn to her car and kissed her goodnight. She headed back to her house in Milpitas.

Try, Try Again

I have done 9 job interviews in the past two weeks (yeah, I was interviewing before I even got fired). I have had 3 callbacks. I guess this is a numbers game. If I get enough initial interviews, I’ll get a some callbacks, and ultimately a few offers. I’m starting to get used to the rejection. There will be more rejections than not – so I’d better start getting used to it.

I had an extended set of interviews with Tim’s company in Campbell. I had been working with that company in my old job, so I knew a bunch of folks already.

I finally got the chance to meet Heidi. Heidi does phone support for their engineering department and she has an amazingly sexy voice. It is some kind of European accent that I can’t really identify. In some ways it seems Austrian or German and at other times it seems French. Either way she really makes it sound sexy – kind of like Kathleen Turner as Jessica in “Roger Rabbit” but more exotic. So I figured she would look like an East German weightlifter steroid experiment gone awry. It is unlikely that someone with a voice that sexy would actually look like Kathleen Turner (well, back in 1981 – see “Body Heat”).

Turns out, she's a knock-out. Well, OK, not perfect, very pretty but a little heavy set. But frankly – women readers pay attention – a little curvature on a woman is not a bad thing. Hollywood sets the image that heroin addict thin is a good thing – well it’s not. Not for me, anyway. Nor lots of other guys I know.

Also, no ring. Hmmm, I'm still noticing such things.

The Big Job Hunt

Well, it’s time to get serious about the job hunt. I have been out looking for a new job for about 2 months now - but I haven't been really serious about it. Nothing like getting your ass fired to provide real motivation.

I also need to file for my unemployment benefits. Might as well get paid to do nothing. Fortunately I can do this on-line, and don't have to drag my ass down to some depressing government office.

Resume writing has always been a challenge. I’ve got about 10 years of experience. I have 3 patents on semiconductor design. I have 6 published papers in peer reviewed conferences and technical journals. Bachelor's of Science in Electrical Engineering, Masters in Computer Science. So there's a lot to go on there.

I called a friend who is a head hunter (head huntress??) and arranged for a meeting tomorrow. She says that there are quite a few positions that she could get me interviews for. In a panic I started calling all the working folks I know, to see if there are any available jobs. I must have e-mailed out 40 resumes, posted on monster.com, and surfed the web for any thing that looked like a job opening.

Deep down, I feel like I should be taking a vacation – I could really use an extended vacation, but panic at the prospect of prolonged poverty has me hyper-actively hunting. I toy with the idea of going to work for the summer at California’s Great America – I could put it on my resume as research in queuing theory. I really should do this. It'd be fun, and I'd probably meet a lot of girls. But my insecurities won’t let me.

I called Lynn. She said that it was a somber and quiet day in the group. She wore black. She does seem a bit more distant since the hitting incident. I wish she would let me in a bit more. She is out looking for a new job as well.

There is an opening at one of our (well, now her) company’s suppliers. They are a mid-sized company in Campbell. She is on pretty good terms with a guy named Tim there. She gave me his number and I set up an interview for Wednesday. She's interviewing for the same job on Thursday. One of us should be a shoe in for the job. Either way, it looks like Tim should be able to cash in on a referral bonus (if they're offering one).